Gravity

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I love you, like the moon loves the tides
She flickers behind dark clouds
The shadows dance to celebrate her glory
A bright and shining example of the beauty I see in your heart
Your smile is ever in your eyes
Even when darkness finds your soul

Like a stormy sea your natural state is not destruction
You thrash and roll against the pull of the glorious moon
Demanding to follow your own path
But she always pulls you back
Because she knows the deepest fathoms of your heart
She whispers and you hear nothing but her voice

Harken to the night sky, to the great epiphany
To that moment shared between kindred spirits
Two separate souls desperate to emerge as one whole
The light and dark are always in balance
Always struggling for supremacy
Yet one needs the other to survive

The tides love their commander
Always prompt to follow the path
She guides her children to advance and to recede
As life often does, rising and falling
Stagnation is death, and she embodies the will of chance
The harbinger of change.

Oh moon, hanging ever in the darkness
The tides’ love for you will never ebb

Creativity comes in cycles.

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For me at least. Since the last thing I posted I haven’t written a damn thing. But what I have been doing is going out and taking pictures, doing watercolors, painting D&D models, and playing with polymer clay. It seems that to write, I have to wait for autumn and spring. I don’t know if it has to do with being bipolar, if being able write is one side of the coin and visual arts are the other. Never to twain shall meet. But, although it is a bit frustrating, I do keep getting ideas for what I plan to write – whenever that time comes.

I went through a period of almost ten years where I didn’t write at all. I lost my writing partner and no on else was the least bit interested in reading my work or listening to my ideas. I got very downhearted. Then I made new friends, my fiance writes and encourages me to write and to become a better writer. We’ve spent hours when we were supposed to be sleeping just coming up with new ideas for our worlds. I started writing again last year around NANOWRIMO and wrote at a furious pace for awhile. I didn’t win but I got all my ideas down and I’ve got a beginning, middle, and ends all planned out. However as soon as I had some people read it they informed me that I’d basically have to rewrite it. It took a long time to figure out what I did wrong, and 10,000 words became less than 4,000. It all makes a lot more sense, but it’s also disheartening. I decided to take a break and focus on art, and I’m pretty happy with the decision. Now it can just settle in the back of my mind and when I go back to it I’ll be happier with what I’m putting down.

So here is a bit of what I’ve been working on, until the writing bug bites me again.

Celtic Hare Ceramics Waterdrops

Writing Prompt: The First Time

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Feel free to use this prompt yourself and link it here!

The First Time

“The first time?” I crumbled the last of my bread into tiny pieces, scattering it on the rocks around me. I looked over at Garth while settling down among the stones. “It wasn’t like I’d thought it would be.” I gave a soft laugh.

“How so?” he asked, pulling his saddle across his lap. He pulled out a mending kit from Vittoria’s saddle bag and began looking it over for any damage. He’d taken on this task himself, to mend our leather goods, as I’d taken over all the cooking. Of course my choice was sheer self preservation, Vittoria could only reliably make tea. Garth really did try to cook, and it was technically edible I suppose, but we were all happier with me on the job.

“I suppose I thought it would be harder. I mean it was difficult in the actual doing of it, because it wasn’t something I’d planned, but I thought the emotional impact would,” I waved a hand in the air, “you know, I’d worried it would bother me to take someone’s life.”

He grinned, “You’d make a terrible assassin moralizing every time you killed someone.”

Vittoria walked into the little hollow and began adding to the small pile of dry wood beside what would be the fire pit come nightfall. I was very pleased that we didn’t have to skulk across the countryside, at least not yet. Fires and hot food every night, at least when it didn’t rain, was something to look forward to.

“What are we talking about?” Vittoria asked, shoving her short blonde hair out of her face impatiently as she pulled a small spade from our collective pile of equipment and began scratching a clear space for the fire.

“The first time she killed someone.” Garth said, flapping a buffing cloth at me before going back to work on the saddle. I couldn’t see any dirt on the leather let along anything to buff out but I didn’t say anything. Garth loved horses, and found some aesthetic pleasure in caring for their tack.

“Oh, interesting?” she asked.

“Not really,” I said, “It was just two idiots who tried to rob me. It didn’t bother me in the way I’d thought it would.” I’d had a few uneasy dreams about it, in fact, but not about killing them. It was the way they’d touched me, especially the one whose throat I’d cut first. “One of them had made some remarks, about what he’d like to do with me after they had my money. He figured they might as well take my pretty clothes and the rest of me too.”

“Shit.” Garth grimaced, with the ladies of his acquaintance he was a perfect gentleman.

Vittoria showed all of her straight white teeth in a grin that had no humor in it, “What did you do to them?”

“I got to the knife in the back of my belt and sliced the one holding me in the gut. It wasn’t a very long blade, I could just barely get it out of the sheath and it barely nicked him really, but let me go.” I watched as a small bird landed on the rocks and began pecking at the crumbs. “I hadn’t seen him as the real threat, he’d gotten very tense when his friend had casually mentioned raping me, so I went for that bastard first. I got him across one eye and then slit his throat but it wasn’t quite deep enough. His friend started babbling and backed down the alley and I had to do him too. I made it quicker for him, getting robbed wouldn’t have bothered me if it was just about money and I don’t think he’d had anything more in mind. I just didn’t want any witnesses. I had to go back and finish off his friend.”

“That was good thinking,” Vittoria growled, “How old were you?”

“Fifteen.”

“How did you get away? You’d have had to have blood all over you. Throat-slitting is messy.” Garth asked, heaving the saddle aside and waving a hand at my sword and sheath to go over the leather of the scabbard and belt. I handed it over and looked up at the sky.

It wasn’t anywhere near time to start cooking but I needed to do something with my hands so I began rummaging through the saddlebag by my feet to decide what I was going to make. It really depended on what game I got in a little while, which I’d probably not get until twilight, but I could probably make a guess that it would be either rabbit or some sort of game bird. The stream near the picketed horses wasn’t deep enough for much more than crayfish.

“One of them had a dark cape sort of thing, it was fashionable at the time and didn’t show the blood very well. I just walked back home wrapped up in it. I expected any moment for a constable to grab me and go ‘Aha!’ or something stupid like that. I don’t think I even heard anyone talking about the murder, so I guess they weren’t anyone’s favorite pair of lads.” I scooped up my bow and began to string it. “I’m going hunting, when I get back its one of you who has to tell yours.”

Yes, again with the worldbuilding tropes.

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This time I didn’t write it though. I’m not usually a huge fan of reblogging articles but since I’ve written a bit about this I figure I’ll throw this one in here. The only one I don’t entirely agree with is the faux medieval world one and I’ll go a little bit into why. Go read the article if you want and come back, I’ll wait……

7 Worldbuilding Tropes Science Fiction and Fantasy needs to Stop using

It really all boils down to comfort zone really, which is probably a cop out since I could study more about other countries. The problem is I don’t want to screw anything up, or misrepresent something. I know more about Europe/UK/US and not a lot about other cultures. It is sad but true. I can legitimately blame this on my schooling. I went to a terrible no good very bad ACE Christian school. You should definitely read up on it, especially if you are interested in ever writing about indoctrination or if you’ve been in that kind of situation… or if you are just morbidly curious. In any case one of the many problems with the school work is that it is extremely US centered. Even the materials they send to other countries don’t usually have anything extra in them as far as the history and culture of that country, just the good old USA. Now I’ve taught myself a lot more about Japan at least since I attempted being a Japanese/Ceramics double major in college. Again, I couldn’t handle going to college since I had a very awful school experience and was never taught to study or do research – just memorize everything for the test.

I have other cultures in my world, but I’m trying to blend different cultures together to make some that are both familiar and different. The area I’ve placed my story in is a small nation with a lot of trade from all over the place. My main city is a port and has tons of foreigners, ex-pats, and visitors so I can explore other cultures in a way that I hope won’t end up with me messing up. Anyway if you haven’t read the article go read it. If you want to give me what for in the comments and tell me why you do or do not write fantasy/scifi in a faux medieval world I’d love it!

Writers block? Not really but…

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I can’t really say I’ve had writer’s block for the past month or so, because I’ve had a ton of ideas. I’m not lacking in understanding what happens next or what I want to write. What I’ve been lacking is the energy. The holidays always sort of suck that out of me, and it hasn’t helped that I’ve been feeling off physically for about four weeks.

I just have been lazy as well, and that is my own fault. I need to start eating better again and go back to the gym. Sometimes I feel like the reason everyone makes resolutions to get healthier in January is because November and December are full of holidays that personify excess for most people who are fortunate enough to be able to stuff themselves silly. When you’re surrounded by that much food it is easy justify eating all of it, at the very least to make sure it doesn’t go to waste, then of course I’m going to make a pun because after that it goes to waist. Yes, I’m a terrible person.

So tonight I decided to go back and reread everything I’ve written because one of my problems is getting back into my narrator’s voice. I can’t just start writing because I need to get back in his head. And boy is he more than ready for me to get back to him! As I’m rereading I can’t help but edit a little bit, even though I promised myself I wouldn’t edit until the first draft was done. I’ve also found myself adding and subtracting bits here and there because I am remembering how he sounds and thinks and he has more to say about these situations.

I wish I had some advice to give people who have writer’s block, because I’ve basically had it for 10 years until 2014 came along and handed me a story I had to get out of me. But all I can say is that you need to read and you need to think about what you’ve read and why you enjoyed it and try to remember why you enjoy writing. One of the things I enjoy most about writing is for people to read it. Some people say they write for themselves and to an extent that is true, I love writing even if no one reads it. But I’d be lying if I said it didn’t matter if people read it. I want people to enjoy my work.

I’m rambling again, so I’ll get off here and get to writing for the first time since November. Here is the last thing I wrote so far today, a little piece that got slipped into my first chapter because he wanted it that way

“Most children, even those who live in cities surrounded by iron, were taught that this was a place of danger. Hell, most children including me were told they’d be dragged out here and left for the fairies if they were naughty. Of course I’d never heard of anyone who was, but someone always knew someone who knew someone. You know how it is.”

First pieces out of the kiln!

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I’ve been waiting for a long time for some of my pieces to be out of the kiln since the woman I’m paying to fire everything has her own work for the Tamarack and the work of her students ahead of me. All that has come out so far since they are just bisqued are some jewelry and four statues. One of the statues broke in the kiln and broke some more once I got it home. I’d expected that though because I didn’t do a good job. I want to redo it later in the style of the others. I don’t have those painted yet so I’m just going to post what I’ve got painted! I don’t have a pendant/bead tree for the kiln so it would cost a lot of money to glaze them since they’d all have to be lain flat so I’m making do with acrylics.

Crimson Butterfly

This is the first piece I did in the jewelry and Its all mine! The color isn’t very good in the picture but it is red with a brown background. It’s gilded with gold acrylic and around the edge where you can’t see is copper leaf. It’s inspired by Fatal Frame 2: Crimson Butterfly which is my favorite video game. I have a lot of stories about that game but I also have two crimson butterflies tattooed on my shoulder it means so much to me.

Violet Butterflies

These are purple with gold accents and are a commission from my boss for her daughters.

Lucky Blue Butterflies

I made these as sort of friendship pendants, not sure if anyone will want them though!

Gemini

This is a Gemini bracelet for my friend Amber, I think I’ll tie leather strips to the sides and add a gold clasp.

Rose Garden Bracelets

I’m really pleased with how these turned out, although I sort of wish I’d bought silver paint for the blue one instead of gold. I have a few more of these to paint so I’ll get some silver before I do those.

Athena

I’m not so sure about this one, ha! It has a gold border and brown background and you can’t tell but it has a copper body and gold wings, ears, and claws. It looks a lot better in person than it does in a picture.

Anyway I’m really happy with these, I did four others that I’m not as thrilled with so unless I figure out how to salvage them I’m not going to bother posting them!